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When people ask me what made me decide to compete in bodybuilding, I always say that I found peace in the gym and weightlifting. So naturally, as a Virgo that’s driven by detail and structure — I wanted to see what the next challenge would be in my fitness journey. I was introduced to bodybuilding in 2016 and over the next year and a half I competed in two different amateur shows under the bikini division with the National Physique Committee (NPC), the largest amateur bodybuilding organization.
Competing while being a therapist offered me the ability to view the sport from a clinical lens and gave me a dual perspective of the mental health challenges faced by competitors. The entire process of bodybuilding was mostly enjoyable for me since it allowed me to develop new relationships with people that had the same affinity for weight lifting. But no one, not even my coach who is one of the best in the industry, prepared me for what can happen when you step off of the stage: post-show depression and a disordered relationship with body image and food.
I didn’t realize my sole interests and personality had become about the competition until after the competition had ended. Once it did, I was hit with a huge wave of depression and anxiety. I searched everywhere online about what I was experiencing and stumbled on a article on what about “post-show blues” which can trigger symptoms of depression once a competition is over. This can come from seeing your body change back to its baseline, feeling confused about nutrition, and lacking the intense structure that previously guided your days when training for competition.
The truth is, unless you pay for your coach to help you reverse cycle back into a regular diet, you are left on your own to navigate the physical and emotional repercussions post-show. And even if you did pay your coaches to help with the nutritional aspect of things, they’re not qualified to help you navigate your mental health or talk to you about things like body dysmorphia and depression. These coaches have hundreds of clients worldwide and are being paid to get you on stage. What happens after the stage is the dark side of the sport that competitors weren’t talking about back then.
Unfortunately, instead of dealing with these dark feelings, I signed up for a second competition. Days after I stepped off of the stage, I struggled with my mental health again. I felt anxious without the sense of structure that being on prep provided. On top of that, I found myself battling deep feelings of insecurity and disappointment about my body reverting back to its baseline. They tell you not to “attach to the body” which means, being aware that your body will not look the way it did on prep. But, I did — as I imagine many others do, too.
In conversations with other amateur competitors, we also discussed other issues that come up post-competition including binge eating, restriction, and body dysmorphia. One of the most common post-show side effects was orthorexia (an extreme obsession with healthy eating), as competitors often practiced unhealthy eating habits under the guise of “discipline,” despite not having any show coming up. This also looked like signing up for show after show just to stay in a certain type of shape, which isn’t realistic or attainable for most people. Orthorexia can also happen to those involved in any type of competitive sport or training program who either stop training or take a break.
Overall, I still think that bodybuilding is an incredible sport and am fascinated by the greats in the industry. But like any sport, I believe that there are a limited number of people who can navigate it in a healthy way.
If you are experiencing post-competition anxiety or depression or notice unhealthy eating and exercising habits, consider taking a break. Remember to give your body the compassion and nutrition that it needs. Here are a few things that helped me transition back to healthy habits post-competition:
- Recall the things that you were doing pre-competition: Reconnect with your hobbies and find alternatives to how you want to structure your day. Reminding yourself that there is life outside of fitness is key for recovery.
- Remember that there is no such thing as “good” or “bad” food: Consider working with a trainer or dietician that takes on the health at every size framework post-competition. Tapping a mental health professional to help you work through negative self-talk can be helpful, too.
- Unfollow any fitness influencer that engages in orthorexia or body checks: These can be particularly triggering and you want your feed to be filled with body diversity.
- Do some journaling and self-reflection: Ask what does balance look like for me? In order for recovery to take place, you’ll need to reestablish a new routine that integrates your personal interests. And if you can’t do that on your own, tap a professional for help.
That said, I also think that there’s plenty of work to be done within the industry to make life during and after competition healthier and more sustainable. Coaching programs need to make a greater effort to ensure that amateur competitors are aware of what they are getting into prior to competing and to continually assess the mental health of their competitors to ensure overall well-being throughout their competitive journey.
To competitors looking to get into the sport, my best piece of advice is to embrace the process that prep offers and remind yourself that the value of the experience is in the journey not the outcome. Make an active effort to prioritize your mental health by nurturing your hobbies and relationships throughout prep so that the transition back to your routine can feel a lot smoother. Lastly, get really clear on your “why” because if the goal is just to have a nice body, you can easily find yourself going down an unsustainable path.
Alyssa Mancao, LCSW, is a social worker, group practice owner, and keynote speaker. She received her master’s in social work from the University of Southern California and has been practicing for well over a decade. She has contributed to various well-known outlets to address strategies for increasing self-connection and navigating conflict in relationships. Her recommendations for mental health strategies have been featured in Vogue, Elle, and Women’s Health. Alyssa is a PS Council member.